Third Culture Kid(s)

Every so often, I feel the need to kind of recap some of the good things that are happening in my life.  It seems especially important right now, given that I’m running on fumes, sleep-wise.

So, some good things:

• I had a nice, long letter from probably my best friend in Japan a couple of weeks ago.  She sent a box full of stuff for MM (including a simultaneously educational/annoying book of Japanese songs, complete with electronic music component), as well, and that made her month.  The letter was really lovely, though - very encouraging, with a strong hint of “get over yourself, things aren’t as bad as you might like to think” that I needed.  She’s an incredible person in her own right: a widow twice over (lost her first husband - the father of her three then-young kids - in a tree-felling accident; lost her second husband - they were ‘together’ for about six years, in a long-distance relationship, but married only for about two months - to cancer), who manages to care for her aging mother-in-law, who raised three really grounded, sweet kids, and who’s come through the pain of her losses with empathy to spare.  But the thing I love about her is just that we’re kind of kindred spirits.  She’s known me since my mid-20s and has seen me ‘grow up’, so to speak, and still stays my friend.  It would be great if I could see her in person at some point, but I’m pretty much grounded for the duration, and her job (service industry) gets in the way of any substantial travel.
• Despite all the sleep issues, one thing that’s been improving consistently is C.’s nighttime sleep.  He still wakes up to eat once in the wee morning hours, but it’s fairly perfunctory and then he’s back to sleep again.  He’s generally been doing two 3+ hour stretches over night - not fabulous, but a damn sight better than the previous every-two-hours he was pulling before.
• I went to, and returned from, an academic conference this last weekend.  It’s the big one in my field, and I presented a paper for one of the panels.  The paper itself was every inch the confused blatherings of the recently post-partum, but I did it, only embarrassed myself marginally, and, in the meantime, I was able to catch up with grad school friends that I haven’t seen in years.  That part was really lovely - real grownups and real grownup conversation, AND with people I really enjoy.  It was downright refreshing - I hope it isn’t years until I see them again.
• Last week’s push to write my paper renewed my interest in writing my dissertation, but with a bit of realism on the side.  I had been trying to write something groundbreaking, but at this point I’ll settle for “something done.”  I’m trying to rework my case studies and keep up the momentum, although post-travel sleep issues (yes, the whole family had to come along, since C.’s nursing and my usual childcare is currently vacationing in Hawaii) have gotten in the way a little bit.  I was even weirdly comforted by learning, from another grad school friend who’s already published a book in the field, that I’m not alone in my problems with working away from school and with small children.  He’s got a daughter who was born about 6 months before MM, and he’s working a full-time job to pay for her preschool = no time/energy to write.  He’s got good stuff to say, and I hope he finds the energy and wherewithal to write it; maybe I’ve got good stuff to say, too, and maybe my lack of writing really is more an issue of logistics and sleep deprivation, and not a referendum on the state of my intelligence.